Thursday, March 18, 2010


I had no idea I took such a long vacation from blogging. No wonder out-of-state people I know are begging for updates!

Anyway, I experienced one of those "smack on the head" incidents last night and I feel compelled to write about it. I have been going through a serious period of reevaluation and reestablishing my relationship with God lately, and I have had some pretty profound revelations. 

The biggest one happened yesterday when Brandon and I were getting ready to watch a movie together. He had just finished working on someone's car and started to get a little choked up. I asked him what was wrong, and he said he was just tired of working on other people's projects, how he so so badly wants to do his own thing. But, money never allows for "freedoms" we wish we had, or the kids need us, etc. 

It hit me: This is not OUR time to do the things WE think we want or need to do. This is a time when we buckle down, raise up our kids, and invest in our family, not just ourselves. Our kids need us; our kids need us to be responsible with our finances, but mostly, they need us to be responsible with our TIME!

We are one of those "young couples" that started their family, by world's standards, way too early. We never got to experience all the things that the WORLD says young people should experience: life in a dorm room, getting drunk, know, those "ever-so-valuable" life experiences. 

When did getting sh*tfaced at a party and making a jerk of yourself become a "life experience" that everyone should go through? 
Oh darn, I'm off on a tangent...


We are one of "those" couples. I was at a furniture store the other day because we are in desperate need of a new dining room table. We only have three functional chairs, and we're a family of 6. Family dinners are very important to us, but we cannot even fit at our table! So, I'm getting a quote on a dining table with a bench and four chairs. I mention that I need a table to seat a family of 6, and the lady was completely taken aback that I said I needed to seat a family of SIX. She was confused, and asked me how many kids I had...I said I had four kids, and our current situation just is not working. She asks me how old I am, I say that I'm 24, and another saleslady says "I didn't have my kids until I was 40!" Then, I got "the look"...some of you know "the look" that I am referring to...that "oh, you poor, poor girl. So young, so many kids, NO life experience". And it wasn't done in a loving way, it was done in a condescending, yet pitiful way. 

What some people do not understand is that we are on a different mission than most people here. We wanted a big family, so why wait? I get the whole "get a career, be stable" thing, but our situation has worked out beautifully for our family.

And this is where the rubber meets the road with this post:
YES, we may be young, and YES we are currently making sacrifices that most young people do not have to make. We are making decisions that most people our age do not have to make. Oh no, but do not let the lack of material possessions or "worldly" experience fool you, because my treasure is in Heaven. Just because we are young and have to cut things out for the good of our family and for the GLORY OF THE ONLY ONE WHO MATTERS does not mean we suffer! We have a wonderful life; yes we cannot do the things that most people our age do-go on fun vacations, buy all this neat stuff. But we get to do all that fun stuff when the kids are all out on their own; we can go wherever we want, I can have the freedom to stay home and watch my grand-babies if I need to, and I'll even have the energy to do it.

I am NOT knocking anyone who has babies late in life; we all follow our own path that God has laid out for us. I just cannot stand when people feel "sorry" for us because we chose to start our family when I was only 18 and Brandon was 21. We have a great life, and right now, in the famous words of Dave Ramsey, we are living like no one else so later we can live like no one else :) Sure it can be a bummer to not be able to do what we want, like fix up our 1950 caddy, but we just have a different lot in life; now is not our time to focus on ourselves, we have a much bigger task at hand.


Shawnee said...

I get those reactions too when we go places. I had my first son when I was 19. You are doing a great thing raising your kids early. I look at it as I will be able to do so much more with them later because we got started sooner. People in their 40s are just having by the time their child is 18 they will be near 60. But just think with be 24 by the time your oldest is 18. You will only be in your early 40s. With So much life and vigor, I never saw it that way til someone pointed it out to me.
Have a blessed week!!